As a person with Bipolar1 I often find myself fighting feelings in my mind. I am doing great as far as my illness, but sometimes I just have a hard time coping with life. I just fight these feelings, and know that they will be with me, and that they may never go away. I am a very positive person, and look for opportunities to see good in things. Recently I have taken on some negative traits such as not believing that we will have enough money to live on. I also see our world as a very dark place to live.
With Bipolar it is very normal to have mood swings. I can be doing great, then I face depression in a matter of hours. I turn everything into negative, and see myself as a big loser. I fight hard to stay positive, and know that I am a Christian who has the victory.The victory comes, and goes quickly as my mind lies to me over and over again. The mind is a powerful thing. I sleep very well at night, and wake up very sluggish. It is during the day that my mind has the liberty to feed me the lies about life.
Another part of Bipolar is mania. Recently I have been fighting with all my heart against the upper part of Bipolar illness, Mania. I am feeling pretty good, and my mind will tell me that I am switching to mania. I know that I am not manic, but in my mind I feel that I being told that is not true. I will slide into another mania, and my mind tells me that I will not make it out of it. Of course all of this is a lie, because I am not manic, and I am doing great.
I am writing these blogs, because there are people out there who face the same mind games as I do. You may or may not be Bipolar, but you still face the battles. I have some advice. Stay close to people who love you. They can help you, pray with you, and talk you through the mind battle. Keep your minds stayed on good things. Focus on the best things, things that can keep you in control of your thought life. Pray for me, I pray for you.
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